Day 365

Whew.

What a bittersweetness I am feeling. In fact, writing my very last blog has overshadowed and superseded the reality of turning 61. I truly nearly forgot.

When I am close to finishing a book that I have really enjoyed, I experience a homesick-thirsty feeling. If I have about 10 pages left, I dole them out carefully. I save those last few pages to read until I can sit quietly, not feel rushed, and not be interrupted. I want to cherish and be entrenched in the ending. Occasionally when I finish a book, I actually miss the characters for a period of time.

My heart is heavy as I write this blog. It feels similar to finishing a great book. 

A few of you have been with me from the beginning. You have been incredibly faithful. My gratitude is fathomless. I am deeply humbled by your kindness. 

I will miss speaking to you every day.

Though I am ready for a bit of a respite, this is not the end. My plan is to begin the tedious task of going back and reading through the nearly 138,000 words I have written and begin an editing process. A thought from the beginning was to compile this into a book. I will begin that journey. 

My website will remain the same and I will give periodic updates, so stay tuned. I have had many thoughts about if and how to continue. I may write a “Weekly Wednesday” blog to keep my connection.

To stay tethered to your hearts. 

What day is it?” asked Pooh.

It’s today,” squealed Piglet.

My favorite day,” said Pooh.

Serious Sunday

This is a Zimbabwean proverb from the Shona tribe, meaning that a person who harms another or borrows from someone will often forget, but the person who is harmed or borrowed from will always remember. 

Chop down a tree with an axe. The axe does its job, it cuts and destroys a once-standing, strong symbol of growth and life. The axe moves on to the next job, but the tree is forever changed.

When a person is distant from an event he or she has the mindset that the past is the past. It is forgotten and they have moved on. But often the victim is left ‘standing there with their guts hanging out’, as a friend once described personal pain.

Are you an axe or are you the tree?

I think we are both. I have been an axe. I have used words to hurt. I have also remained silent and utilized my axe in that form. In any manifestation, an axe brings pain.

I have also been the tree; having my bark shredded and my branches lopped off. 

Because we are human and live in a broken world, we are going to cause pain and receive pain. 

It is my thought that we must find a way to let go of the whole tree when we are injured. Allow the stuff underneath to die, as well. The gnarly and destructive unseen parts are where danger lies. Roots of bitterness cannot remain. They will continue to search out a new form, a new life in which to pour its poison. 

Some hurts come to us due to our own decision-making. And some hurts come to us from an axe-wielding insidious source. Of the latter, we have no control.

That is when we must choose ~ will we spend the rest of our days maimed and send our bitter roots into another life-force or will we choose to become firewood and bring warmth and beauty to others?

Serious Sunday.

Clarity

Spanish philosopher José Ortega y Gasset said “The human has a mission of clarity on earth.”

*When our minds become confused because of today’s overwhelming problems, unclear thinking and mental gibberish shows up. We owe ourselves clarity.

We also owe it to others. When we give the wrong signals to someone close, a family member or friend, that relationship can become strained or even broken.

I know from experience, how frustrating it is when someone misunderstands us. However, often I have discovered that I caused my own frustration. Perhaps my directions were unclear or my answer was a bit soft and non-definitive which may have created a mixed message in the other person’s mind.

When I put the shoe on the other foot, I realize that when I receive confusing signals from others, I, too, experience disheartened head-shaking.

Befuddlement and discombobulation can demean careers. They can build a wall. They can wedge a movement. They can fracture love.

How well I remember the childhood saying, ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can ever hurt me.’ Au contraire.

Words hurt deeply. At times I would RATHER have a broken bone than a misunderstanding of communication with someone for whom I care deeply.

Writers deal with words. Artists deal with color and shapes. Clear words and images communicated from one person to another are what make us human. They help or hurt humanity.

True clarity originates with God. He understands and forgives our imperfections, even when we have difficulty recognizing them. He communicates clearly the message of love and grace. There is no bafflement, bamboozlement or bewilderment. All of that messy fog comes from our own heads.

The goal: “A mission of clarity on earth.” Are we all clear on this now?

 

*Inspired by the book “When True Simplicity is Gained”